The Empire of Real North Dakota is a massive, environmentally stunning nation, ruled by Lemonade with an iron fist, and remarkable for its zero percent divorce rate, pith helmet sales, and devotion to social welfare. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless population of 2.906 billion Real North Dakotans are ruled with an iron fist by the dictatorship government, which ensures that no-one outside the party gets too rich. In their personal lives, however, citizens are relatively unoppressed; it remains to be seen whether this is because the government genuinely cares about its people, or if it hasn't gotten around to stamping out civil rights yet.

The large, corrupt, socially-minded government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Education, and Law & Order. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Big. The average income tax rate is 77.9%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The powerhouse Real North Dakotan economy, worth 367 trillion Spherical dollars a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector is led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Arms Manufacturing, Book Publishing, and Tourism. Average income is an impressive 126,511 Spherical dollars, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Kindergartners' favourite dance move is the stop-drop-and-roll, every workday begins with group therapy, purported secret military bases are dismissed by Lemonade to be highly-advanced toilet factories, and flamethrower-toting soldiers are also equipped with fire blankets and extinguishers. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Real North Dakota's national animal is the Duck, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Carrot.

Real North Dakota is ranked 282,244^th in the world and 10,476^th in Osiris for Largest Gambling Industry, scoring -13.13 on the Kelly Criterion Productivity Index.